We鈥檙e coming up to the most magical time of year, but how do you deal with your pre-teen child who feels too grown up for Santa and all your family Christmas traditions?

For some parents, when their child stops believe in Santa it can feel like the end of their kid鈥檚 childhood.

Mark Thomas, Leicester-based IT project manager and dad to an eleven-year-old son, is one of them.

He said: 鈥淲e had so many lovely traditions that he just isn鈥檛 interested in anymore. It feels like he鈥檚 moved on and is almost embarrassed if we remind him. It鈥檚 a shame as Christmas was such an important time for us to spend together as a family. Now if we ask him to write to Santa or put cookies out he just says 鈥楧ad 鈥� Santa鈥檚 not real!鈥�

鈥淲e鈥檇 have so much fun setting the Elf up in crazy situations just to see the look on his face in the morning or decorating a gingerbread house together. He鈥檚 our only child so it鈥檚 sad that we can鈥檛 enjoy a magical Christmas anymore.鈥�

Feeling a sense of loss is normal

We spoke to our therapists to offer advice on how to manage this shift; both for the child and the parent.

Our member Heidi Soholt said: 鈥淓very childhood developmental milestone is characterised by gains and losses 鈥� while you celebrate your child鈥檚 achievements and progress, there can be simultaneous feelings of loss 鈥� the end of a precious stage that cannot be regained.

鈥淵our 鈥榖aby鈥� no longer believes in fantasy and magic, they are asking awkward questions, becoming increasingly independent and more exposed to ideas and beliefs from outside the immediate family. This can be challenging for parents; a transitional time for both the child and the adult.鈥�

It's natural for kids to ask questions聽

Susie Pinchin, also a 香港六合彩精准资料 member, says parents can feel upset when their kids no longer believe in Santa.

鈥淭he years when they do believe let鈥檚 our inner child out and it鈥檚 easy to get caught up in the excitement and seeing the wonder and innocence in them as their excitement builds.

鈥淗owever, it鈥檚 natural for kids to start to question Santa and have doubts about the big man. It鈥檚 ok to grieve the loss of this innocent stage and want to try to prolong it as long as possible,鈥� She adds.

If your child is starting to question if Santa is real, Susie says not to worry about the right or wrong way to reveal the truth. 鈥淚t depends on the child鈥檚 age and their maturity as well as the way the doubts crept in for them.鈥� says Susie 鈥淯sually, they鈥檒l bring up the subject of whether Santa is real. If they start asking questions 鈥� ask them what do they think? You may find that you still have some mileage in keeping the magic of belief alive for another year or there may be the realisation that this is now the time for honesty.鈥�

Reassure your child

Heidi also says to remember that your child may also be feeling a sense of loss and sadness, along with concerns about how Christmas will be, now that Santa is out of the equation.

鈥淩eassure your child that Christmas can still be magical, special and fun, and that knowing the truth about Santa doesn鈥檛 mean no presents!鈥� says Heidi 鈥淢aybe now is the time to start new traditions and an opportunity to try new things now your child is older. You could try making decorations, wrapping gifts or shopping for grandparents together.

鈥淛ust remember however emotional you feel about your child鈥檚 newfound understanding about Santa this is an important and positive milestone and a sign of healthy and normal development.鈥�